Crying? There's no crying at a Christmas Concert!

Call me crazy and overly emotional, but I actually became teary-eyed in a Christmas concert last week. Patrick and I attended the School of Music Faculty and Staff Christmas Concert. The music was wonderful, and it was so nice to hear professional musicians again.

As I sat in the audience for this fine presentation, I began to cry. What? Well, you see... I love Christmas music. I love playing it, singing it, whistling it, and directing it! In fact, I am known for whistling Christmas music as I walk down the halls of the schools where I've taught.

So why the tears? Get this... For the first time in at least 22 years, I am not singing in, playing trombone in, or conducting a Christmas concert or special. That may not mean a lot to you, kind reader... but to a musician, it's pretty devastating. It is always a true joy for me to participate in Christmas concerts of all shapes and sizes. Whether a church presentation, tree-lighting ceremony, or school band concert, I really LOVE to perform and conduct. Sadly, due to the fact that I currently don't have a band job, I'm not attending one church full-time, and I am not a part of any local ensembles, I have no opportunity to play, sing, or direct. Sound pathetic? Maybe so, but it was a weird feeling to be sitting in that audience and to realize that I was missing out for the first time in a very long while.

I hope that this Christmas season is the only one in which I don't have an opportunity to participate musically. It really has been hard to get into the spirit of the season. Music is medicine for my soul, and I wouldn't be who I am without it!

Just What the Father Ordered...

A few weeks have passed since I've posted anything. It's not that I haven't wanted to post, it's just that my brain could not settle on a topic. If you know me, that probably doesn't surprise you.

These past several months have been some of the most interesting of my life. I'd be lying if I claimed that this has all been easy. I realize that, compared to the struggles of others, the past months should have seemed like a breeze. Really, what do I have to complain about? Well, consider me a wimp. Don't misunderstand. I knew that this transition would be a test of character. I wasn't blind to the fact that it would be an emotional journey. There are so many things that have changed and I'm certain it's just the beginning. Part of me thought I'd be stronger. It was pride, I know. It's always been hard for me to admit when something is scary or overwhelming (probably the tom-boy in me).

As things have begun to settle down a bit, I should be pretty content. After all, I'm getting to spend more time with my wonderful husband. Our marriage is growing stronger each week. I have a job I like and feel like I'm contributing. That being said, I still find myself attending my own pity party this week. Satan is trying hard to steal my joy. I know that God is defending me against the liar's attacks. But, none-the-less, I'm having trouble letting some things go.

The amazing thing is that God has a wonderful way of pointing me back in the right direction. He draws me to himself in such undemanding ways. During some reading time this week, He has shown me several things that have knocked me right in the heart. I have a major problem (as my family will tell you) with taking everything too seriously. I try to deny it, but it's true. While reading "My Utmost for His Highest" this week, several things have appeared to be written directly to me.

Never show the depth of your life to anyone but God. We are so nauseatingly serious, so desperately interested in our own character and reputation, we refuse to behave like Christians in the shallow concerns of life. Make a determination to take no one seriously except God. You may find that the first person you must be the most critical with, as being the greatest fraud you have ever known, is yourself. My Utmost-Nov. 22

As if that weren't hard-hitting enough, the next day included this convicting passage.

Another thing that distracts us is our passion for vindication. St. Augustine prayed, "O Lord, deliver me from this lust of always vindicating myself." Such a need for constant vindication destroys our soul's faith in God. Don't say, "I must explain myself," or, "I must get people to understand." Our Lord never explained anything-He left the misunderstandings or misconceptions of others to correct themselves. My Utmost-Nov. 23

Needless to say, I've had a very healthy, but painful, dose of God's correction in the past two days. What started out to be a pity-party post taking a couple of days to write has turned into a major lesson in spiritual growth for me. What would I do if God ever gave up on me? He is more merciful than I could ever deserve and more loving than I could ever repay. Thank you, Father!

A Beautiful Season!

As a deer hunter and lover of the outdoors, I have always had a special place in my heart for Autumn. It always brings cooler weather, the peak of football season, and a total change in attitude. Thanksgiving and Christmas mean time with family and remembering the birth of Jesus Christ. During the late fall, I usually think of curling up on the couch with a good blanket and some hot chocolate. Of course, there's also nothing like fresh baked cookies in that scenario, too!

Living in Virginia, there's one other part of the season that is wonderful. Unlike Texas where there are mainly pine and mesquite trees, Virginia's countryside is filled with the most beautiful changing leaves. Even the most mundane trips in the car are turned into great views of the trees.







There are many more shots like these, but it would take all day to post them.

On another note, I have found a part-time job. I start tomorrow. Thanks to Sarah's father, I was hired by an insurance agent to be the office receptionist. It's just a few hours every day, but I'm ready to have a reason to get out of the house. This position is not in my field, but it is just temporary while I live here. After all, I need gas money for visiting Patrick.

Together At Last...

If ever there were a happier reunion between a man and his dog...

Not Texas, but...

Okay, Virginia is definitely not Texas, but it's very beautiful! The leaves are turning and they look so wonderful. There are also historical markers everywhere. I hope to take the time to visit most of them. Within just miles of the house, there are Civil War battlegrounds and landmarks. It's a history lovers dream. If I can just get over the Virginians who don't know how to drive. They don't seem to know that you can use cruise-control, blinkers, or that the left lane is for faster drivers.

The weekend was great! Patrick and I actually spent two and a half days together for the first time in four months. We attended church together for the first time since June. We visited FBC, Norfolk. It was such a blessing. Sometimes I feel like we are just getting to know each other again, sort of like dating. As a friend reminded me, we started with very brief phone calls once a week and lots of letters. Then, our first face-to-face date came at graduation. Now, we are talking everyday on the phone and seeing each other on the weekends. I am looking forward to next March when we can actually live together and see each other every day.

Saturday was dreary, wet, and cold, but Sunday was beautiful. We took a walk on the beach front that is a part of the base. It was a lot of fun. It will probably be a lot colder in the coming weeks and months so that may not be an option. So we took advantage of the gorgeous weather.

We're not in Texas anymore, Se-Se!

After a two-day drive in our loaded-down Tucson, Sebastian and I are now "residents" of the Commonwealth of Virginia. It's not a permanent move, but a big one just the same. With some major help from Melody, who put up with Sebastian in her lap for most of a 20 hour drive, we got here relatively unscathed. Saturday, we got to spend the day with Patrick. Thanks to Mason and Sarah giving us room and board, Sebastian and I will be able to spend time with Patrick on the weekends while he is stationed at Little Creek for the next five months.

This is definitely not Texas. From drivers who really can't drive, to the fact that it's actually Fall here, I have a lot to get used to. I will try to blog more later about this new chapter in the journey! Until then, thank you for praying for us!

You Know The Drill...

Open mouth, insert foot! Yep, that's pretty much been my default motto this summer. It is beginning to seem like I've been living on a diet of feet. Yep, it sounds gross, but I don't think I'm the only one who knows the taste.

Apparently, a steady diet of feet is not low-in-fat. I haven't seemed to lose any weight on it, in fact, I've gained. What I did manage to lose is my witness, a relative's respect, and a dear friendship. I know that there's not much I can do to erase the not-so-tasty meal I've been dishing out. However, there is a God who has forgiven my selfish yielding to my sin nature. I praise Him for sending His Spirit to guide me through the painful heartache of missed opportunity and selfish words.

I know that I'll always be in danger of resorting to the "insert foot" diet. It is absolutely mandatory that I pray for words before "opening my mouth." God, guide my words so that I only bring praise to you! Give me words that bless and not curse.

A much needed family reunion!

This weekend, I took a much needed trip to see my church family in Corsicana. It was so wonderful. It could not have come at a better time for me. It was like I never left. My family at MBC was so welcoming. Talk about making someone feel loved! They sure did that!

Even though I know that God has started us on a new journey, MBC will always be home for us. They will never know how much we love them and how much they've encouraged and inspired us. More and more, I know that they model the kind of church God desires. Whoever said "bigger is better" was gravely mistaken. I will always be thankful for the time we had in that church. And I will always have a huge place in my heart for them!

Thank you MBC for a wonderful time of worship and for your never failing love for us!

Midnight Madness

Ever had one of those nights when you're up really late for no reason at all? I can't seem to force myself to get off of the computer and just go to bed. I've been wanting to blog, but the well has run dry...

My husband says he's bored with blogs lately because no one is writing... I guess I am part of the problem. I hate to say it, but tonight, I'm blogging just for the sake of blogging. Pathetic really...

I wish I could come up with a really profound post that packs a punch. Sorry, dear reader, you're out of luck with this one. I'm working on one that may come together in a few days, but I'm just not sure how to say what I'd like without stepping on any toes or digesting my own foot!

My American Soldier

It's official! Patrick has graduated from Basic Combat Training! To hear it from him, read his blog about the subject. He is officially an American Soldier. Our trip last week could not have been better. We made it safely to South Carolina on Wednesday. Upon arriving, we found out that, due to the threat of Hurricane Hanna, Family Day had been canceled and Graduation had moved up to Thursday. After hearing from Patrick that night, we had our plans all worked out.

Thursday morning, we got up bright and early and made it the the graduation ceremony location. We were really early, so we waited about two hours. I tried to find Patrick across the huge parade field with my binoculars. After some time, the soldiers began lining up in their companies. I was able to spot him briefly. The ceremony was relatively short. As soon as it was over, we got to see Patrick.







After a trip to see his barracks and grab all of his stuff, Patrick was signed-out to us for the remainder of the weekend. We got to spend all day Thursday together as a family. Then, as a special gift, our family treated the two of us to a hotel stay for the night. It was very nice to get to spend some time talking and catching up.

Friday, we all spent the day together visiting some places on post and hanging out at the cabin. Then, Saturday morning, my mom, sister, and brother-in-law left for the return trip to Texas, and my brother, sister-in-law, Patrick and I all set out for Norfolk, VA. We arrived at Little Creek Naval Base with time to spare and enjoyed a great dinner together before dropping Patrick at his next training school. He will have more freedom at the School of Music than he had at Basic, but it will be a lot of work. I still miss him greatly, but I know I can hear from him on the phone more often and he can also e-mail. And I'm looking forward to seeing him on the weekends.

Even Gustav and Hanna Can't Stop Me!!!!

Well, at least I pray they don't! If you've been keeping up with the blog, you know that I am leaving tomorrow night to drive to South Carolina for Patrick's Family Day and Graduation!!! That's T-minus 24 hours and counting...

In case you can't tell, I am slightly excited about seeing my husband of almost twelve years. We haven't seen each other since June 24th. My mom, sister, brother-in-law, and I will be pulling an all-night drive. Yes, I am a bit concerned about all of the rain and winds from the remnants of Gustav. Please pray for our safety and sanity. Yes, SANITY! Oh, don't act so perfect... You know, if you were riding in a car for 16 hours with that many personalities, you'd be asking for prayer too! Our plan is to get to Ft. Jackson by Wednesday evening, where my brother and his wife will join us. Then, bright and early Thursday, we will get to be with Patrick. Unfortunately, it's looking like Hurricane Hanna is headed for SC and just in time. Yikes. I hope she doesn't spoil the fun.

Let's just say... I don't think I've been this excited about anything in a long time.

This Just In...

Patrick's final letter from Basic arrived today! He's out in the field, so he won't be sending anything else out. But, his last letter was great because it included this:




Of course, he complained about it because it was taken during the first week of basic (two months ago). He says that he looks much better now. Plus, he said they photo-shopped the hat into the pic. He didn't wear it when the photo was taken. I don't really care. He looks great to me. But, I'd much rather see him in person! Ten more days!!!

A Moment of True Worship

Last night, what started out to be a normal choir and orchestra rehearsal turned into one of the most wonderful times of worship I've ever experienced. The church I currently attend just hired a new Minister of Music. Last night, the pastor introduced him to the members of the choir and orchestra. The new minister shared with us his heart for God's people and the vision he has for the ministry he is now leading. He was so genuine and passionate about what he feels God desires for the music and worship ministry to be about. Then, it happened. He introduced all of us, choir and orchestra, to an older song that will become an integral part of what we do. He reminded us all that we each have something or someone seated on the throne of our lives. Whatever it is, it should be replaced with our amazing Father, God. So we sang these words with just a piano accompanying us.

"I See The Lord" by Nancy Honeytree

I see the Lord
High and lifted up
Seated on the throne
Of my life.

I see the Lord
High and lifted up
Seated on the throne
Of my life.

And He is Holy
He is Holy
He is Holy
Seated on the throne
Of my life.

The sound of all of those voices praising God was definitely a powerful one.

I know in my life I've placed other people and things on my throne. I've even sat on it myself for long periods of time. I need to give God the place He is due every day, in every way, in every possible aspect of my life.

"In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another: 'Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory.'" Isaiah 6:1-3

2 More Weeks!!!

Patrick called today. Wow! Again, God knew what I needed! His platoon didn't get to call on Sunday, so I was moping around all week. Hadn't even gotten a letter. Then, while I was taking a small nap, my phone rang. It was Patrick. He sounded great. He passed his final PT test on Tuesday. YIPPEE!!! It's downhill from here. We'll arrive at Fort Jackson exactly two weeks from tonight.

He's got a big "ruck" march tomorrow. Don't know exactly what that means. Then, next week he's got to go on a big trip "in the field." It's called Victory Forge. He'll be away from civilization for several days doing soldier stuff.

Because he passed his last test, he'll be rewarded with a three hour on-post pass tomorrow. Maybe he'll get to call me again for longer than ten minutes. I could not be more proud of Patrick. Forgive the major sappiness, but he's totally my hero!

Good Rainy Day Piece

If you haven't heard it yet, scroll through my play list and find Adagio for Strings by Samuel Barber. It is great for the day we're having here. Let me know if you like it. It's one of my faves.

Apology

Yes, the time on this post is accurate. I woke up about an hour ago after a very vivid nightmare. Fully awake, I could not fall back to sleep. I've been thinking about something someone said about my blog. So, I have to do this.

Last week, I changed the "About Me" section on my blog to state that "I am currently a stay-at-home bum. Call me pathetic, really."

I didn't even think about the fact that many of my own readers might be offended. Please know that I in no way meant to insult or offend those of you who are choosing to be Chief Domestic Officers/Operators. I admire stay-at-home moms. You work your butts off and are constantly negotiating the tough waters of being a parent. Two of my own sisters are the hardest working stay-at-home moms I've ever met. When I have kids, I hope to do the same.

Please understand, that in my current unemployed state, I truly feel like a bum. Unlike actual mothers, I am lazy and have no motivation to do anything. I guess I could get a job if I wanted one, but so far, there's no desire. This was all I meant by the new material in that section. It has since been changed. Please know my heart on this matter. I truly did not mean to insult anyone.

Thoughts...

Not exactly sure what I’m doing. It probably smacks of wallowing in self-pity. White walls staring back at me. Fan is spinning over head. Who am I today? God I want to follow you. Show me what to do now. Head leaning on closet door. Procrastinating once again before bed time. Sleep? Not sure I can… So much on my mind. Missing my soul-mate, he’s many states away. Grieving possible lost friendship. Stupid me. Why did I put myself first? I’m not like that. Heart is aching over wasted time and wasted words. Foolish pride. Stubborn selfishness. Can’t wait to reunite with hubby. Life is definitely changing. Yes, God has a plan. I’ve known it all the time. Problem is the enemy is trying hard to throw me off course. Not going to happen. God won’t let it happen. Praying for peace and clear vision. Made it so far because of powerful prayers of faithful friends. Tomorrow’s not far away… His mercies are new every morning! Thank you Father for loving me!

And the Countdown Begins...

Well, if you must know, I actually initiated this countdown in my planner as soon as Patrick left. Now that the numbers are actually feasible, I thought I'd let my readers know.

I will get to see Patrick in exactly 16 days!!!! Woohoo!!!

Can you tell I'm excited? My mom, sister, brother-in-law, and I will all head toward South Carolina exactly two weeks from today. I can't believe it. We'll get to see Patrick on Family Day and then he'll graduate from Basic on September 5th. WOW!

The reality is that we actually will only get to visit for a short time before he goes to his AIT. Hopefully his time there will go by quickly!

Another Rainy Monday...

If you are familiar with any of Steven Curtis Chapman's older music, you'll recognize the title of my post. Here I am, sitting at my computer on a rainy Monday morning. It's amazing that through our weakest days, Jesus keeps us strong. All we have to do is keep our eyes on Him.

Weak Days
Written by Steven Curtis Chapman and James Isaac Elliott
II Cor 12:9

Another rainy Monday,
Looks like I'm gonna be late again;
Why does the race I'm runnin' never seem to have an end.
A day away from Sunday,
Feels like I'm already losing ground
Funny sometimes how quickly my emotions get turned around;
They're letting me down.

CHORUS
I gotta keep my eyes on Jesus
Through the weak days;
In a world where we really don't belong,
I've discovered if I keep my eyes on Jesus
Through the weak days,
Then even on the weak days He'll make me strong.

The spirit is so willing
When the fellowship is so sweet;
How soon all the good intentions
Find the flesh is weak.
But there's a power waiting,
With no limits to times or space;
All of our doubts and fears disappear without a trace
When we look on His face.

(chorus)

And when we keep our eyes on Jesus,
We'll gladly follow where He leads us.

God, please help me keep my eyes focused on you when everything around me seems to be pulling for my attention. You are powerful and mighty! You give me strength when I'm unable to do anything on my own. You know the answers before I ask the questions. You are everything and I am nothing...

When I Need Him Most!

Just when I was feeling my worst this week, God showed up in the most wonderful way. No, I wasn't really going through anything major. But, I was at a low point and at the end of my emotional rope. I've been feeling sorry for myself and digging myself a nice little hole of self-pity.

It all started with the fact that I've been extremely lazy this week. That's never good for one's emotional health. Way too much time to think about how depressed you are and how much time you're wasting. Add to that wonderful mix the questions I have regarding a recent correspondence I initiated with a friend. Throw in the fact that my computer crashed on Monday for the second time in exactly one month.

Tuesday, I had a frustrating interaction with a commander in Patrick's unit. I had called to ask if I could take Patrick from Basic to the School of Music. I was just following the advice of someone at the School of Music. I was treated very unprofessionally and overheard them making jokes about Patrick's last name and his musical job. I was furious, of course. So, I e-mailed the commander in a plea for information. That night, I went to bed with a heavy weight on my mind and heart.

After staying in bed longer than usual on Wednesday, I got up and continued my pitiful existence. In a moment of awareness, I knew I needed to spend time with God in prayer and in reading the Bible. I had been neglecting that time for a few weeks. Obviously, God wanted to speak to me. So, I began to study the passages for day. He really got to me with a pair of pages from My Utmost for His Highest. Then, as I was reading, my cell phone rang. I recognized the area code as that of Ft. Jackson. I assumed before answering that it was a commander returning a call I had made earlier. When I said hello, Patrick's voice answered with "Hi". I was shocked!

It was Wednesday at 2:00 pm and I was hearing my husband's voice in utter amazement. The timing could not have been any better. He was given direct orders to call me. Talk about a perfectly timed surprise. God directed actions of Patrick's drill sergeants in order to send me a message of His love. As it turned out, the commander who received my e-mail directed Patrick's officers to allow him to call me himself and answer the questions I had. We actually got to talk for about 25 minutes, the longest conversation we've had during Basic. When I told Patrick how much I had needed to hear his voice, he said, "God obviously knew what you needed." I immediately felt better. I could feel God's presence at that exact moment. He was watching over us and wanted me to know that He is in control all of the time.

God wasn't finished yet. Patrick also had the news that he had finally passed his 2-mile run. Wow!!! The test was Monday and he did great. My mind jumped to the fact that I will see Patrick in exactly three weeks. I am so excited. The pride I have for him is immeasurable. We reluctantly ended our phone call, but looked forward to the next call.

Then, last night, I attended church orchestra rehearsal. God reminded me of how much I love to play music in worship. It was a wonderful climax for the sad beginning of the week. I know people are praying for both Patrick and me. God continues to answer those prayers in amazing ways.

Lots to say, not sure how...

Blogging is a complex creature. It's hard to know what is acceptable to share and what is past the point of what others should be subjected to. Is it a therapy tool with which to rid your mind of all emotions or does it have to be more focused on a subject? Does it have to be structured? Or is it just a blank slate?

My struggle with these questions seems to be making me second guess what I want to share. So much is going on in this brain of mine...

A Sweet Word from Patrick

Upon returning home from a quick but wonderful trip to OKC, I received a new letter from Patrick. In it, he shared that although he still hasn't passed the 2-mile run, he has improved greatly on it and the rest of the physical fitness test. He has one more opportunity to pass it and has felt the prayers of all of his family and friends. Please read the following words from Patrick that he asked me to post.

TO ALL OF OUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS:

"Thank you so much for your prayer support. Daily I can feel God's guidance through this training. My PT scores have drastically improved and I WILL pass the next test. I love and appreciate each of you and look forward to finishing my training and getting to thank each of you in person."

-Patrick

I just want to add my thanks as well for your prayers for me through this time. I can feel them as I get through each day. I am SLOWLY adjusting to this no job, no schedule thing. It's a very hard thing for a band director to get used to, but I'm not complaining. It is also difficult knowing that Patrick is working extremely hard in very tough surroundings and I'm doing nothing.

On another note, it's so relaxing right now listening to the thunderstorm outside. We've been so long without rain and I almost forgot what it sounds like.

Thank you God for the rain and for your constant provision in my life.

To Conduct or not to Conduct...

And I don't mean electricity...

A week has passed since my trip to Kansas City and I have neglected to do any blogging.

My trip was wonderful. I made some new friends, renewed an old friendship, learned a whole mess of useful stuff, some not-so-useful stuff, and ate at a few really good restaurants.

I'll spare you all of the details, but would like to share the conclusion of my journey. I went to KC wondering if I should continue my pursuit of conducting/band directing. It has been my prayer that God would show me very clearly if I'm doing the right thing. All week long, He showed me that this is definitely what I love to do and I should seek to do it with all of my heart.

We concluded the symposium with this question from the director -
"Why am I a conductor?"

Immediately, my pen began writing the following words with no question and no doubts:

I believe that God has given me a deep sense of musical appreciation. I live and breathe the music that I hear and perform. My passion is to convey my love of music to others in a way that allows them to know who I am. Music moves me in deeply profound ways. It is at the core of who I am and to not share it would be a great denial of who God made me.

When I grow up...

You know, I'm going to admit something. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up and I've been seeking God's direction. Forgive me if you've heard me say this before, but I needed to be honest. Currently, I'm sitting in a dorm room at a university far from home. No, I'm not a student here. I'm attending a week-long wind band teaching symposium to further my personal education in the band world. I've wanted to be a conductor since I was in junior high but I've only dreamed it. Yes, I am a band director, but it's not the same. I don't think I feel like explaining the difference right now.

I've always wanted to attend a symposium like this to see if this is really what I should do. This is the first one I've actually attended. Usually, I get interested in participating in one, then I chicken out with excuses like no money and no time. I've never done it because it's a very personal growth experience when you are critiqued on your conducting technique.

Well, Patrick encouraged me to attend this one because we could finally afford it and he knew he'd be gone so I'd have no excuse. So, here I am. And, I'm wondering why... As I meet and interact with most of these people, I'm finding a huge sense of self-importance from each one. It's the kind of career in which you have to know the right people and have a "no fear" attitude. And ego must be a prerequisite also. I feel like I don't belong. Of course, it could be that I'm just emotional about Patrick not being here to talk with me.

We've only finished one day, and I am actually having a good time. It's just that I am getting even more confused about what path I should take in my career. I want to be obedient to what God wants for me, but it's hard to understand right now. Everyone asks me where I teach and I have to say, "Well, I'm between jobs...and here's why..."

God, I know that you have a plan for me. Help me be open to what it is.

S...N...A...I...L...M...A...I...L..........................................

In case I wasn't exactly sure why people have all but stopped using written word as a means of communication, I now have no doubts at all...

I finally received mail from my dear husband this week. Three envelopes came on Monday after the holiday weekend. Those three envelopes contained letters that covered June 24th through 30th. It was great to read about Patrick's new adventures in the Army. I have been obsessed with checking the mail. I feel bad for wondering why he hasn't written. He has written, it just takes the US Postal Service FOREVER to deliver things. I guess that's the real reason they started selling those FOREVER stamps. Maybe that's the kind of forever they meant.

A fourth envelope came just today. It covered July 1st through 3rd. Okay, in case you didn't see the date for today's post, that is a full week behind. He mentioned that he's finally getting the bed making routine down. One day, he was the only one in his room that got it done. Everybody else got their beds tossed... I'm supposed to ask my brother-in-law what that means.

He sounds like he's having fun in some ways. He really loved rapelling down a fifty foot tower. He also enjoyed the nutrition class.

Well, after catching up with him through reading those notes, I feel much better. Little by little it's sinking in that he's in the Army. I'm extremely proud of him. We have no idea how long we'll be living the military life, but it is a huge adjustment.

And now to some not-so-happy news... I found out that our precious dog must have some teeth pulled. Several of our family members' dogs have had this done. I scheduled the surgery and pray that he'll do okay. The weirdest thing is that Patrick and I had a discussion right before he shipped about our sweet dog. I didn't want to have to make decisions on my own about the dog's medical needs if they were major. Basically, we agreed that if it was less than a certain amount of money, I should proceed. Now I am just debating over letting Patrick know. I don't want to worry him.

Only 5 Minutes???

Patrick was able to call today. But, he only had five minutes of time before he had to give the phone to the next guy.

He sounded so much better than he did last week. This weekend was relatively light due to the holiday. He seems to be handling the training okay. He mentioned that he really needs some duct tape. When I asked him why, he explained that he and others have been wrapping their feet in duct tape to help protect the blisters. OUCH!!!! Can you imagine pulling it off??? I guess he's not using the band-aids I sent. He did say that one guy in his unit busted his head open and everyone remembered that Patrick had some bandages. He was able to help the kid out.

Of course, we couldn't talk long, but he said that he'd mailed me several letters already. I haven't gotten anything from him in the mail. I hope they come tomorrow. He did have time to mention that tomorrow is the Gas Chamber day. Yikes!

God Bless the USA!

Wow! What an amazing weekend! I must say that this year's Independence Day weekend has been a wonderful one. Friday morning, Mom and I treated ourselves to a movie and had a great time. Then my sister and her husband came over for some good ole' hot dogs and ice cream. After we got our Guitar Hero fix, we headed out to join some friends from church. A group of us went out to Lake Grapevine to see the Grapevine fireworks display. We chose that location because we thought it would be less crowded. The super thing was that because we were sitting at such a high elevation near the dam, we could actual watch about nine different cities' fireworks displays. It was a great evening. While we waited for the sun to set, we played games and fellowshipped.

Of course, I couldn't totally relax because I was hoping that Patrick would have some personal time to call. I mean, come on, it's our nation's birthday... But, I managed to enjoy the fun anyway.

Saturday was not extraordinary. I had to mow the lawn. I don't hate it, but I slept too late to get it done before the heat really turned up.

Today's church services were so powerful. We had guest speakers in both. The morning service was filled with lots of history about our Christian heritage as a nation. It was really eye-opening. It was amazing to hear all of the stories about our Founding Fathers and how much they wanted to be guided by God and their love for Jesus Christ. We've all heard a few of the stories, but people today have tried to distort the facts and they only focus on the to least religious founders, Franklin and Jefferson. However, the other 54 signers were devout Christians who wanted Biblical principles to define our nation. I encourage you to visit WallBuilders to learn more about it.

I spent the afternoon at my sister's place. We went swimming and got sunburns. Ouch!

This evening, I was talked into singing in the choir. After all, I had heard most of the music before. We had a guest soloist and also Rick Scarborough from Vision America. He inspired us to take a stand for Christ and for America. It was a very powerful and moving message.

This 4th was very different for me. First, Patrick was not here to celebrate. And second, he's in the military now and that gives a whole new meaning to anything patriotic for me.

Blisters, Band-aids, and Brats

Oh, Happy Day!!!! At about 5:30 pm on Sunday night, Mom and I were exiting the interstate to visit my grandparents in Hope. Suddenly, my phone rang and it was Patrick. Between the road noise, dog in my lap, and just the shear excitement, I couldn't hear him very well. I told Mom to pull into a gas station just a block from my grandparents' house and I was able to speak to Patrick more clearly.

His unit had started Basic Training on Friday after a few days at Reception Battalion. His first three days included paperwork, shots, uniform issue, a hair cut, and I'm sure a lot of yelling from Drill Sergeants. He said that it hasn't been unbearable yet, except for the painful blisters he and most of the other guys are getting on their feet from their boots. I thought the boots were supposed to be fitting better than that...oh, well, what do I know? Patrick asked me to send him a box of band-aids. Actually, he asked me to overnight them. So, first thing Monday morning, I went to Walmart and bought a large selection of bandages and some antibiotic cream. I hope they don't make him throw them in the trash. When I went to mail them, I couldn't overnight them because Hope doesn't have an airport. The best I could do is get them there by Wednesday (today). I'm not even sure if he'll get them today because I'm not sure how often they get Mail Call.

Patrick said that the sleeping arrangements are better than he thought they'd be. He is in a room with seven other guys. The worst part of the training has been the unruly teenage and twenty-something brats who won't do what they are told. Patrick said he could totally identify with the Drill Sergeants. It reminds him of being a band director. Problem is, as band directors, we punished the problem kids, not the whole band. In Basic, it's quite different. The whole company gets punished when the brats cause problems. Needless to say, they've already received a great deal of punishment. Hopefully, those guys will grow up sooner, not later.

I'm not sure how often Patrick will get to call, but I know I'm looking forward to each call. I know I need to start sending him some letters.

Adjustments

We knew there'd be some adjustments to make when we felt the Lord calling Patrick to join the Army. The obvious ones of course, like being separated for the longest time in our marriage, me living with my mom, Patrick being under constant pressure, neither one of us being in control of anything, doing what the Army wants us to do...

Now that he's gone for training, I've become aware of some adjustments I didn't plan on. You know, the silly ones like learning how to spend the day when you are a teacher and school is out for summer. Not only is school out for the summer, but I have no job to return to in the fall. How weird is that? For the first time in our marriage, or in my life for that matter, I don't have to get nervous a few weeks before school starts. This problem has plagued me since childhood. Like clockwork, as a student and as a teacher, I have always become sick a few weeks before school. This summer, I don't have that to dread. I didn't look for a job for next year because I know I won't be able to fulfill the length of the contract and I wanted the flexibility to visit Patrick and other family during this time. What I didn't fully realize is that now I have nothing to anticipate. How am I going to spend my time? I've been told that the more busy I stay, the faster our time apart will go by.

So far, I've been LAZY. I'm cutting myself some slack, as this is really my first week to have time to do anything. It's the first week we've actually been settled long enough to waste time. To my credit, I have managed to do Mom's yard work and help her plant some new flowers. I also got an oil change and a car wash. I think that's pretty productive. Mom and I are making a trip to Arkansas to visit my grandparents. After that trip, I'll be living on a schedule. I've found that it's the only way I can be productive.

There are other adjustments to make, of course. I'll probably be letting you know about some of them as I go. For now, I'm just settling in to life as a bum. I'll keep you updated on that!

On another note - I did get to talk to Patrick Tuesday night after his plane had landed in Columbia, South Carolina. His group was waiting for the bus to take them to Fort Jackson. I haven't heard from him since, but I know that God is watching over him. I expect to hear from him next week or the next.

And He's Off...

I wasn't quite sure how I'd react today, but it has been an emotional one.

I woke up to a text message from Patrick at 7:10am saying that he'd be briefed at 10:15am and shipping at 10:30am. I quickly replied to say we would be there by 10:00. He responded that we should get there earlier just in case. So, I called Melody to see if she wanted to go and forfeit a few hours of her much needed sleep. She said yes, so Mom and I hurriedly got ready and headed to downtown by way of Melody's to pick her up.

At 9:09am I received a text from Patrick that said "Fixin 2 swear-in". We were still a few minutes away. At about 9:30, Mom dropped Melody and me off at the front door of the Federal building so that we could try to find Patrick. Mom tried to find a parking spot and finally found one. We had to park in Metered parking and she only had enough change for thirty minutes. Oh NO! I told her that I'd pay the ticket if we got one.

So, we proceeded through security, got our badges, and made it upstairs. We were just in time. We waited a few minutes while they prepped for the Swearing In ceremony. We got to be there with Patrick when he officially swore in. The pics and video are grainy, but here goes!




















We waited after the ceremony to see Patrick one last time and watch him get on the bus. He will travel by bus to the airport and then fly to Fort Jackson, South Carolina. Please pray for his safe travel and success in Basic. I will keep you posted as much as possible. Thank you for your love and support.

Last Night of Freedom

Not exactly sure of how to start this post, but here goes.

I just got home from spending the evening with my wonderful husband Patrick. We spent our last day together before he ships to Army Basic Combat Training tomorrow. It is hard for me to describe my feelings tonight. This is something we've been anticipating for several months and now the time has come.

After getting some last minute things done today, we headed into Dallas to meet his recruiter at the Crowne Plaza Hotel. We were supposed to meet him between 7 and 7:30. Little did we know that this would be the start of the "Hurry up and wait" element that we knew would be part of the Army experience. We arrived early, but the recruiter was late.







And WAITING,





Finally, at around 8:00 or so, the recruiter showed up. After a quick briefing and last instructions, he released Patrick to leave the hotel and get dinner. So, we left to grab a bite to eat and spend some time together. I dropped him off at 9:45 and he headed to bed.

Patrick will wake up at 3:45 am, get on a bus at 5:00 am and head to Military Enlistment Processing Station (Federal Building in Dallas). Mom and I and possibly Melody will be heading down in the morning to see him sworn in.

Until then...

Austin Trip Rap-up

We're back! Home together for three days before Patrick ships to basic training. I want to catch you up on our trip to Austin, so I'll refer you to Patrick's post on the subject. Have fun reading. We had a lot of fun exploring.

Quick Howdy and Check in!

I just wanted to check-in with you! I don't have time to get deep right now (I would really like to get settled and start writing better blogs someday). But, life is busy right now. School is out, we have hopefully just one more day of work to get done at the good ole' band hall. Officially, there are eleven days until the big move and 21 days until the big life change. Patrick leaves exactly three weeks from today.

I wish I could describe the emotions I have been experiencing these last few days, but I can't put a label on them. I am sure that eventually this huge change in our lives will hit me, but I am going on adrenaline at this moment. It was very sad to hug our students and say goodbye. Many of them cried and that really helped us feel loved. We will miss them.

As usual, I am procrastinating. I should have been cleaning and packing tonight, but I've squandered my time once again. Please pray for us in the weeks to come. Pray that I'll use my time wisely and get things done. Please pray for Patrick as he continues to prepare for the physical and emotional trials ahead.

Sorry for the short sentences... It is SO past my bedtime...

Checking things off of the list...

In our four days of school, 19 days until we move, and 29 days until Patrick leaves, there are many things that we've got to get done. The check list is huge. Yesterday, we checked-off one more thing. SELL THE MIATA. CHECK.

We loved the little car, but decided we don't need it anymore. We didn't want to pay to store it while Patrick's in training. So, we headed to Carmax and they made us a good deal. It was a breeze. No problems at all. That was a big weight off of our shoulders. And, we got more than enough money to pay-off our new computer. Yippee!

We also checked-off a couple more items:
MOVE KAYAKS TO MOM'S HOUSE AND INSTALL STORAGE HANGER.
MOVE INSTRUMENTS TO MOM'S HOUSE.
MOVE WINTER COATS AND JACKETS TO MOM'S.
GET PATRICK'S FOSSIL WATCH INTO THE REPAIR SHOP.
HELP ORGANIZE MOM'S GARAGE SO THAT MY CAR WILL FIT.
SHOP FOR SOME SUMMER CLOTHES.

Now on to the next thing on the list: PACKING, PACKING, and MORE PACKING.

WARNING! Your foolish pride is showing!!!!

By now, it's safe to say that I've done a number of stupid things in my life. Regrettably and admittedly, some have been adverse to the law (okay, we're talking minor traffic violations...nothing major). But, nevertheless, I've been wrong.

Unfortunately, I haven't learned. Tonight, on our way home from handing Sebastian off to Mom in Dallas, I drove into our neighborhood like any other night. It was just getting dark and no one was behind us or on-coming. At the last stop sign near our house, I stopped, but apparently failed to signal my usual right turn. I didn't realize the mistake. Upon turning, we noticed a cop pulling over to the opposite curb facing us on the next block. We saw him turn his lights off and even discussed the fact that he was setting up a trap for some unsuspecting game. As usual, I made the right turn onto our street to head home. No other car was in sight, except the officer in his parked car. After I had turned completely and headed down our street, (our house is only like the fourth one down) I noticed the nice young cop come up behind me. He followed us until I signaled the turn into our driveway... You know what happened next? Yep! That guy proceeded to turn on his flashing red and blues and pull in behind us. Angry and embarrassed that he had the nerve to flash his lights in my drive way, I immediately got an attitude. I was sure I'd done nothing wrong. After all, I was just on my own block. We had even opened our garage door already for Pete's sake!

Nervous and a bit upset, Patrick and I both opened our car doors. You would have thought we were wanted criminals carrying weapons and drugs. Cop began shining his light in my face and demanded we get back in the vehicle and shut the doors. Honestly, I had no idea what was going on. I was just so ticked-off and scared at the same time. We obliged him and got back in. He told me to roll the window down, and I did. Neighbors literally began coming out of their houses to see what was going on. And I guess that's when I lost it. Cop nicely told me that I had been pulled over for failing to signal my intent to turn. WHAT? You've got to be kidding me... This guy's got to get a life. Pulling me over in my own driveway for doing something that put no one in danger. I was livid. There's a newspaper reporter living across the street for goodness sake.

He took my license and insurance and went to his car. He was there for what seemed an eternity. During that eternity, I was pleading with Patrick about the injustice of it all. Seriously, I know there are laws, but come on!!!! Give me a break! I'm sure there was some robbery going on that he could have been tending to. But for goodness sake, it's my own front yard. TURN YOUR LIGHTS OFF!!!! You're telling the whole neighborhood to come out and watch!!!

After moaning, groaning, and griping of innocence and injustice to my husband, the little man (who could not have been more than 22 years old) came shining his light in my face again. You see, when we moved to this new place, we failed to get new licenses. That gets me into another rant altogether, so I'll just say that we had to convince the man that we now lived at this location and had not gotten the card changed. It was correct on our insurance and registration, just not on our license. You'd have thought we'd just murdered someone. After convincing him of our residence and profuse error in not getting a new license, he wrote me a WARNING for failing to signal intent of a right turn. I think I would have found a lawyer if it had been a real ticket.

You know, I've been pulled over for speeding I think three or four times in my life, but that's it. I understand that there are laws for our safety. But, come on!!! Turning my blinker on when there is no one around. You've got to be kidding me.

...

I've had a few hours to think about it, and Patrick has helped me come to a conclusion and admission. If I had been pulled over for not signaling anywhere else but my own driveway, I'd probably not even be writing this post. But, because I was so embarrassed to be seen with flashing cop lights in my yard, I ranted and raved with anger and hatred. Instead of taking my lumps of correction and having a gentle spirit, I chose to let foolish PRIDE control my responses. Wow, there's that horrible word. You know, if cops gave tickets for letting foolish pride show, I think the world might be a better place to live. Let's just say, I'd be in attitude court way too often! Fortunately, I have the Holy Spirit to handle the attitude correction, not the men in blue!

Drawing to a Close

It is very hard to believe, but things are starting to wind down here in C-town. We had a wonderful time of fellowship on Sunday with our family at Memorial. They are so loving and care so much for us. We are so thankful to them for their support and encouragement. On our last Sunday with them, they gave us a very unexpected gift that included a goodbye video. We all stayed around after the fellowship to watch the video as members said their sweet goodbyes to us and laughed and cried together as we remembered the last four years. We will still attend tonight and next Wednesday to finish up our study of the book, "The Case For Faith". We will miss our church family! This Sunday, we're planning to attend church at the church of our college friends.

School is drawing to a close quicker than we expected. We'll be out on band trips Thursday,Friday and Saturday. Then, after a quick trip to Dallas to spend Memorial Day Weekend with family, we'll take our little convertible to the Carmax to sell it. We are hoping to get what it's worth. We've loved having it, but it's time to downsize. With Patrick being in training for nine months, there's no need to have two cars. Anyone in the market for a 1994 Miata?

Next week will be a blur, I'm sure. No school Monday. Then Tuesday through Thursday are skeletal at best because of exams. Friday's a shortened day with a graduation rehearsal, with graduation on Saturday. Then, after a time of fellowship with our CSO friends on Saturday, we hope to visit our dear friends Julie and Darin in Frankston on Sunday.

As if that's not enough to think about, we'll be doing even more in the following three weeks. Three days of in-service will be followed by a long awaited trip to Oklahoma to visit family. Then, it's packing, packing, and more packing. We'll move on a Friday, have a gargage sale on a Saturday, then rest for a day. Next, we're off to Austin for a few days of relaxation before the big send-off. In case you didn't know, Patrick will be "shipping-out" on Tuesday, June 24th. I hope to go to MEPS to send him off and take pics. We'll keep you posted!

And the Decision is...

I am a little late in sharing this news, but I thought I'd let you know that we've made a decision about Patrick's first duty post. If you've read his blog, then you are already "in the know". After doing some research, we have decided to select Ft. Sill in Lawton, Oklahoma as our first post. If everything works out, we'll be there in March of 2009. We will be much closer to Patrick's family in the OKC metro and still be not terribly far from my family in Texas and Arkansas. We are excited!

Also, I have just begun a new business venture! I am in the process of becoming a Pampered Chef consultant. Not a full-time job, but definitely nice extra income! I am sure I'll be blogging more about that adventure as I get deeper into it.

I know this post is short, but I have to get ready for one of the things we get to experience as Americans - JURY DUTY!!! Say it with me - UGGGHHHHH! I am sure I won't get picked for the jury, and that's why the process is such a pain! I'll let you know what happens!

Have a great Monday!

34 and 75?

Okay, Okay. I won't bore you with a countdown everyday, but I just had to let you know that there are 34 days left of school and 75 days until Patrick ships to Basic Combat Training for the Army!

I can't believe it. Before we know it, we'll be moving to a new place and a new time in our lives. Yesterday, we found out the options for Patrick's Station of Choice. We are praying about which post we should choose. This is a tough decision and we want to make the right one.

We have so much to do! It's hard not to be overwhelmed by the cleaning, purging, packing, moving process. Part of me wants to completely get rid of everything we own, just so I don't have to decide what to keep, store, move, etc.

It is our goal to glorify God during this process. I am learning to trust Him during every step of the way.

So Nice To Get Away...

Just in time for a much needed break, Patrick and I were able to go camping this past weekend. Melody and Danny came along to Lake Murray in Oklahoma. I absolutely love being outdoors! It was a beautiful weekend on a beautiful lake. We learned that Danny is a closet lumberjack and can build a pretty mean fire!!! Thank you, Danny for helping us stay warm! The first night, we almost froze to death in our tents. Thankfully, it warmed up a lot so the second night was more comfortable. If you are not the camping type, I urge you to at least give it a try sometime. I am so thankful God allowed us to have a great time. We even got to use our kayaks!

Here are a few pics:






And a few more:

Urgent Prayer Request

Dear Blogging Friends and Family,

I want to do a shout-out to my Uncle Clay. Hi, Clay! I want you to know that we are praying for you and for Cheryl. I hope you don't mind if I share a little bit of your story.

Uncle Clay has been suffering at home for several months after doctors sent him home with out a hip. Can you believe the absurdity of that statement? He had hip replacement surgery about a year ago and let's just say things weren't done exactly right. Doctors removed the hip and, after a long stay in the hospital, they basically said "we're done" and sent him home. He has been bed bound for months and his only link to the world is a laptop computer and maybe the tv, but I'm not sure about that. He has recently re-entered the world of blogging through his blog Netblogger2. To add to the urgent need for prayer, Clay's wife Cheryl is having surgery today to remove a tumor on her spine. This was a sudden development and now leaves them both with major issues of medical care and concern.

If you have the chance today, please join us in praying for Cheryl's surgeons and a quick recovery. Also, please pray that someone can step in and take up Clay's struggle to receive proper medical care!

Thank you!

It's Official - We're In the Army Now!

Just wanted to let my faithful readers know that it's now official! Patrick has just been sworn-in to the US Army as a Band Member. We will give you more of the details as the weeks progress. At this time, we do know that he will "ship out" to Fort Jackson in South Carolina for basic training on June 24th. We will not know his permanent station for a few more weeks. Thank you to those of you who have been praying with us about this. We know that you are a big part of our lives. Please continue praying that all of the details will be worked out.

We will both fulfill our contracts with the school district. Our last day will be June 13th. Not sure of the living arrangements after that, but I know we will be ready to go!

Stay tuned to Patrick's blog for more details.

Healing Family Hurts (from James MacDonald)

This post is borrowed from one of my favorite blogs. I felt it was very timely today.

Taken from "I've Been Thinking: A Weekly Devotional" from pastor and author James MacDonald)

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7, ESV

Have you got some hurdles to overcome in your family relationships? You know . . . some things that need to change and improve at your house? All of us can at one time or another admit to family problems, causing family pain.

I have just one word to offer you as you seek help and healing for your family: love. Love is relational dynamite that obliterates all obstacles in its path. Talking won't do that for you. Pressuring won't; prodding, insisting, demanding, getting selfish-these all will only tear your life and family apart. But 1 Corinthians 13:8 says, "Love never fails" (NKJV).

Love never fails to what? Let me point out three things that it will handle for you:

#1 Love never fails to conquer selfishness. I am selfish and so are you. All of us need help here. You never have to work at self; it's just right there barking for attention. Love conquers the biggest obstacle in me: selfishness.

#2 Love never fails to conquer skepticism. Over time, it's easy to doubt that anything is ever going to change. Your family disappoints you. Someone does something foolish or hurtful and you want to bail out. But love holds on. Love is being used by God to transform that person-even when that person is you.

I wonder if you've read this far and are thinking, James, we've got real problems over at our house and some pep talk on love is not going to fix it.

You're right-that's why 1 Corinthians 13:6 sits in the middle of the passage: "[Love] does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth."

#3 Love never fails to rejoice in the truth. Love doesn't sit back in some happy delusion that everything will be okay. Love doesn't deny problems, but works to see them changed. Love is an action before it's a feeling.

In love, serve your family when they choose to be selfish.

In love, humble yourself before your family when conflict creates distance. Be the one to go back and say you're sorry. Own your part of the problem. Humble yourself first.

In love, lavish on them words and deeds of kindness and affirmation.

In love, forgive your family by releasing them from the obligation that resulted when they hurt you. Let it go. Don't hold it over them.

And lastly, in love, speak God's Word in any situation regardless of the cost. Truth, delivered with love, is what sets us free. Stand for what's right.

"Love bears all things," says 1 Corinthians 13:7. Love tries again. Love trusts again. Love gives God an opportunity to work. Love is part of the solution. It's a tool in God's hands to work through you in helping your family.

James MacDonald
Senior Pastor, Harvest Bible Chapel

The Absurdity of Human Expectations: Translation - You expected me to do/think/feel what?

I realize that I am not old enough to be considered wise. I certainly don't claim to be a sage. So, if what I have to say is full of holes, then please let me know.

In my relatively short life, I have noticed that the majority of human conflict and disappointment is caused by unmet expectations. These expectations are often too high and unattainable, or worse, they are never made known to the people or groups they are placed upon. One of the common situations in which we display such error in judgment is in our marriages. I am sure I'm not the only one who has placed undue expectations upon my unknowing spouse, only to act hurt when he doesn't meet them. If you don't identify with me, then please keep your perfection to yourself.

As unfair as it is for me to judge my spouse based on my secret expectations, it is equally unfair for strangers to hold any of us to any secret expectations. It is even more reprehensible when family members do this to us.

Have you ever taken a test without knowing what would be on it? Have you ever gone to a movie without having some foreknowledge of the plot or the characters? Do you ever go in for a job interview without first knowing what the job is?

If you answered any of those questions with "NO," then it must be because the more you know of what to expect, the more you can prepare!

Now, what does it all mean? Let's face it - when people get upset with us because we didn't meet their secret expectations, there really is no way to win. How can we be expected to make anyone happy, or at minimum, not angry. I guess the only way to avoid such conflict is to avoid the situations that create it. Or, we could cease to have hidden expectations and simply love people for who they are (faults and all). You would think that in a family, this would be a given - an absolute - a DUH! Unfortunately, we are humans. And humans fail.

God has given us His forgiveness when we do not meet His expectations. The big difference is that God has given us His specific expectations in his word! Knowing what God expects of us can be found through reading the Bible and through hearing Him speak to us. He has a right to be disappointed. He's the only one who can determine if I'm living up to them or not, because He created the expectations! I have no excuse for not doing what I've been instructed to do. However, unlike God's expectations for me, I cannot meet human expectations that have not been made known to me.

If only I had time to Write!

Wow! What a week of highs and lows. I've got tons of stuff buzzing through this brain of mine, but I really don't have the time right now to wax philosophical with you!

However, for a great read, please read Beth Moore's recent blog post: Just Dreaming!

I don't know where to start...

I really want to vent some major emotion today, but I'm trying to restrain myself. I found out some very disturbing information this morning and I would like to spew words of anger and disgust, but God is working on me! It's hard to know how to express this emotion without saying something I'll regret. Some people just amaze me with their level of maturity, or lack thereof. Why can people not act their age? I admire my husband because he can handle this kind of thing much better than I can. He is always the voice of reason when it comes to saying the right things in this situation. Unfortunately, this particular struggle has gone on way too long. I think that it is time to settle things once and for all. Please pray that I'll know how to handle this.

One Man's Leaves are Another Man's... LEAVES!

Ugh! Don't get me wrong, I like trees. In fact, I almost chose a career that was based on trees - forestry. I border on tree-hugger status.

However, it is the lovely little remnants of trees that have my focus today. It never seems to fail. I live in a house with no trees in the yard, yet I find myself having to rake mega bunches of leaves from other yards on my street. Not fair! I realize that when a leaf falls from a tree it can land wherever the wind takes it. I find no fault with the leaf itself. My problem is with the nearest neighbors who choose not to take care of their own leaves and instead put them off on me. You know, I think they actually use blowers to blow them out of their yard and onto mine. In fact, we had one rude passer-by that allowed some already bagged leaves to fall into our front yard. Of course, upon landing the bag busted and spewed its contents onto our lawn. Today, I raked up two huge bags of leaves and have another pile waiting to be bagged.

God made the trees and God made the leaves. I just wish that I didn't have to break my back raking them.

Monday Musings

Back to the real world and real routine. It was nice being away at convention, now it's time to get back to life as normal. We actually managed to get up and work out this morning. I feel like I am on a weight-loss yo-yo! It is so frustrating. Hey, at least I feel better, right?

Patrick passed his audition on Friday. He now will have about 40 days to go to Military Enlistment Processing Station. If he passes everything there, he will be sworn in as a soldier in the US Army. Whew! It is going to be an intense month while we work out and try to get in shape for that. MEPS was the step last year that prevented him from joining the Army. He didn't pass the hearing test and that led to a surgery to repair his hearing. We are praying that God's will is done this time around, no matter what that means. Of course, we're pulling for the Army, but ultimately we want to follow God's direction.

On to the bizarre news of my week. Most of you know that Patrick and I have not been able to have children for whatever reason. Out of nowhere last week, we received a packet of "Baby" coupons in the mail. It was addressed to us. They are coupons for expectant mothers. I don't know how we got onto that list because we obviously aren't expecting at this time. As if that wasn't weird enough, we received more mail when we got back from convention. This time it was from the Welcome Addition Club (for expectant mothers). It included a free can of Similac. I guess we'll be donating that to the church's food pantry. Unless there's something we don't know about, I'm pretty sure we won't be needing that anytime soon.

Well, better get going now. Happy Monday to you all! Enjoy Presidents' Day!