Sunday, December 14, 2008

Crying? There's no crying at a Christmas Concert!

Call me crazy and overly emotional, but I actually became teary-eyed in a Christmas concert last week. Patrick and I attended the School of Music Faculty and Staff Christmas Concert. The music was wonderful, and it was so nice to hear professional musicians again.

As I sat in the audience for this fine presentation, I began to cry. What? Well, you see... I love Christmas music. I love playing it, singing it, whistling it, and directing it! In fact, I am known for whistling Christmas music as I walk down the halls of the schools where I've taught.

So why the tears? Get this... For the first time in at least 22 years, I am not singing in, playing trombone in, or conducting a Christmas concert or special. That may not mean a lot to you, kind reader... but to a musician, it's pretty devastating. It is always a true joy for me to participate in Christmas concerts of all shapes and sizes. Whether a church presentation, tree-lighting ceremony, or school band concert, I really LOVE to perform and conduct. Sadly, due to the fact that I currently don't have a band job, I'm not attending one church full-time, and I am not a part of any local ensembles, I have no opportunity to play, sing, or direct. Sound pathetic? Maybe so, but it was a weird feeling to be sitting in that audience and to realize that I was missing out for the first time in a very long while.

I hope that this Christmas season is the only one in which I don't have an opportunity to participate musically. It really has been hard to get into the spirit of the season. Music is medicine for my soul, and I wouldn't be who I am without it!